A Letter to Myself: Halfway Reflections

Project Horizon is a global conversation experiment by executive coach and high-performance consultant Tim Dutton. It aims to uncover diverse human perspectives by connecting with 100 remarkable people worldwide, linked through six referral-based chains.

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Here’s a list of 7 reminders to carry with you for the remainder of the project. Some of the lessons may even help you after you’ve completed Project Horizon.

Remember, it’s not just about being referred to interesting people.

Of course, if the person has something about them, it makes for a fascinating conversation. But you’re also interested in the effect of multiple links in the chain. The degrees of separation that are created, combined with asking people to refer someone “interesting, but different to them”, make for an eclectic line-up of legends you’ve built connections with.

Look back at the chain started by your friend and colleague from the fitness world; amazingly, it has reached a Nigerian director of an art gallery. On the way, it stopped off at CEOs, world record holders, artists, students, therapists, and even an executive producer of your favourite TV show, Peaky Blinders! I remember walking around grinning after that call, in awe of the magic of ‘the chain’.

And when you’ve been connected with someone you don’t quite connect with, get curious to learn and trust that their referral will take you to amazing places eventually.

Doing these sorts of conversations properly involves the dedication of significant emotional energy. As such, doing more than two a day is challenging. Alongside your actual ‘work’, which involves a lot of online video calls to clients around the world, it’s easy for Zoom fatigue to set in. Thus, planning the time of calls is critical so that you can feel present and engaged.

When your emotional resource is low, your lines of questioning don’t get the best out of the other person. Whilst the conversations are via Zoom, the other person can still feel your energy and enthusiasm. It’s a disservice to those who have given their time to Project Horizon if you don’t turn up in a positive and curious mindset.

Take your time getting through the 100 connections. There’s no rush. And everyone involved will enjoy it even more!

Rushing to finish the 100 calls will also limit the amount of time and space to thoroughly process and integrate (if helpful) the ideas.

Going too fast will also lead to cognitive overload. Like trying to drink from a charged firehose. Nothing will stick or land. The biggest success in this project will come if you allow it to work on you as you work on it.

To do this, remember:

Inputs + Space = Insight

P.S. Space is not just time to think. It’s time with a receptive mind to think.

Don’t be afraid to chase people up.

You were hesitant at the start of the project, thinking you were annoying people. You’ve now realised people tend to be thankful for the reminder. People have busy lives. Even the ones that aren’t busy feel like they are. A gentle nudge is welcomed.

There have been people you thought weren’t bothered to speak to you (e.g. slow replies, no-showing calls) who turned out to be enormous fans of Project Horizon. Drop the assumptions, chase them up and allow the project to work its magic.

Trust that people are reading what you write.

You put hours into writing and publishing the posts. It can feel demoralising when they’re sent off into what feels like a void and met with absolute silence. But then, every so often, someone surprises you by reaching out, saying that they are loving the project. Some weeks, people take the time to share their reflections on what you’ve shared. That gives you a surge of pride.

You didn’t even know they were following along. Now, they’re saying they love it and are engaged.

And, so what if no one does read it? You love the process of writing itself. It helps you distil ideas, checking if you actually understand what you’re writing about. It also allows you to return to the conversations you’ve had with a fresh perspective, looking at the interaction from a different angle.

Just write. And share it.

Going in with an agenda can get in the way of the magic.

Keep business to one side and prioritise curiosity. If you realise there is a business-related angle to explore, be transparent that you’d like to discuss it on a later call, if they’re open to it. Keep the focus on them, their story, and how they’ve made sense of it.

People can sense when you want to get something out of them. Get out of the way of the connection.

Go a little deeper than just the call. Give their world a chance to make an impression on yours.

You’ve read several books written or recommended by people. Watched TED talks by adventurers and scientists. Enjoyed short films by sci-fi producers. Learned to surf to appreciate the bravery of a big wave surfer. Tried out counselling to understand more about mental health (and myself!). Researched more than 20 countries. Before speaking to a musician, you listened to his music all morning. These things help you connect with the people you speak to, whether it’s before or after the call.

Most importantly, continue to play with the ideas they introduce you to. What does the idea mean for your life?

There’s some food for thought, Tim. Munch on that as you meet the next 25 people, and write up the second half of them.

Next time: Insights from connections 51-55.